OPINION: What’s It Like to Stand Stark Naked on the World Stage? Ask Donald Trump

Richard Wolffe | The Guardian UK

US President Donald Trump

The expectation that Trump will embarrass himself does not make his nakedness any less shocking

You know that classic nightmare where you’re at work and everyone is talking but none of them say the obvious: YOU ARE STARK NAKED!

Donald Trump is living that hellacious dream every time he steps in front of the women and men who make up the world’s leaders.             

Stripped of his usual protections inside the White House, Trump exposes himself on the world stage at every conceivable opportunity. This week’s NATO summit in London was no exception, adding itself to the long list of denuded nonsense that erupts in front of every international figure.

First, he attempted to joke with President Emmanuel Macron of France about ISIS. “Would you like some nice ISIS fighters? I can give them to you. You can take everyone you can,” said the man pretending to be the leader of the free world.

“Let’s be serious,” said Macron, dispensing with a translator as he shut down the clown show. “The very large number of fighters you have on the ground are ISIS fighters coming from Syria, from Iraq, and the region.”

You don’t have to be a world leader at a NATO summit to know that ISIS fighters and jihadist sympathizers pose a serious threat to the streets of Europe’s capital cities. You just have to be a grownup who pays attention to the news, such as the fatal stabbings on London Bridge just last week. But that may be asking too much of the man-baby who watches TV somewhere close to the Oval Office.

The widespread expectation that Trump will embarrass himself does not make his nakedness any less shocking. Even after all these years of bare-faced tomfoolery.

So, it was Macron and his French-speaking ally Justin Trudeau, accompanied by a jolly-hockey-sticks Boris Johnson, who all seemed to be dumping on Donald at Buck House on Tuesday.

“You just watched his team’s jaws drop to the floor,” Trudeau said, dropping his hand towards the floor in a performance that also seemed to involve a glass of beer.

It was hard to know what Trump-induced jaw-dropper he was talking about. There are so many to choose from:

Was it the head-wrenching answer a few minutes after his comments on ISIS fighters, when Trump was asked if he supported the protesters in Iran?

“I don’t want to comment on that. But the answer is no. But I don’t want to comment on that,” said Trump, contradicting himself twice in the space of just 20 words.

Then again, maybe Trudeau was talking about the way Trump explained how he betrayed his Kurdish allies in Syria by pretending that “we’ve captured the oil and taken the oil”.

Or maybe he was talking about the way Trump explained at a NATO summit that he understood why Turkey was buying Russian missiles.

“So, you know, there are two sides to the story,” claimed the president who consistently prefers the Russian side of the story.

Of all the threats facing the world – the climate crisis, the rise of Putin-style politicians, refugees, terrorism – none have played on Trump’s mind quite as much as the thought that the world might be laughing at America.

“We need a President who isn’t a laughing stock to the entire World,” Trump tweeted two years before he became just that. “We need a truly great leader, a genius at strategy and winning. Respect!”

Sadly, Trump never became the second half of his own tweet, no matter what he sees in the mirror each morning.

Instead he became the kind of leader who bragged to the United Nations how awesome his administration was. To be specific, he told last year’s general assembly that it was more awesome than “almost any other administration in the history of our country”. At which point, the massed ranks of world leaders started guffawing.

“I didn’t expect that reaction, but that’s OK,” he said.

It is never OK for this fragile snowflake of a tough guy. When asked about Trudeau’s laughter on Wednesday, Trump melted once again.

“Well he’s two-faced,” he said. “And honestly with Trudeau, he’s a nice guy. I find him to be a very nice guy. But you know the truth is that I called him out on the fact that he’s not paying 2%. And I guess he’s not very happy about it.”

Yeah, that must be it. Totally nailed him on that one.

Sitting beside him, Angela Merkel, the German chancellor, was surely impressed with the savage indictment of the size of Canada’s military spending. But she subtly masked her admiration by looking like an anxious patient expecting a bad prognosis.

There was plenty to feel queasy about. Trump once again heaped praise on himself for carving up the Kurds, in alliance with the Russians, Syrians and Turks. “Maybe someday they’ll give me credit, but probably not,” he whined. “But that worked out well. They’ve been trying to do this for a hundred years. That border is a mess for a long time.”

It worked out less well for America’s Kurdish allies, but hey!

Perhaps someday they’ll also give him credit for his Greenland gambit, which he suggested would be part of his forthcoming talks with the Danish prime minister.

“Do you still want to buy Greenland,” asked one cheeky reporter.

“She must be in the real estate business,” said the non-laughingstock president. “That’s a very good question.”

After all those good questions about his genius at strategy and winning, Trump wimped out of his final press conference. “I think we’ve done plenty of press conferences,” he said. “Unless you’re demanding a press conference, we’ll do one, but I think we’ve answered plenty of questions.”

For a split second, Boris Johnson gulped hard at the thought of one more chance for Trump to blow the British general election.

Therefore, the naked emperor declared he would get dressed, unless you thought he was already wearing something fancy, in which case he would stay happily inside his birthday suit. RESPECT!

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Comments

  • kamtanblog  On December 8, 2019 at 3:21 am

    Humpity dumpity aka imbercile

    An embarrassment to the American people.
    In my opinion he should be “institutionalised”

    Emperor has no moral compass or clothes…
    Naked truth
    Nothing but truth
    So help me god !

    Let’s be fair the idiot in chief is a demented
    ”imbercile”….who let the dog out !

    Kamtan 🇬🇧🇬🇾🇪🇸🇬🇧👽

  • wally n  On December 8, 2019 at 12:10 pm

    COMEDY TODAY…..
    you are siding with the WEAK “LEADERS”, like the kids hiding and making fun of the STRONGER/SMARTER, whispering behind their parents backs, then growing up to be trudeau/macron??
    CANADA…heading toward the toilet sh.. hole status, no jobs, no future, unable to support stupid open door policy, bankrupting cities???
    FRANCE two steps closer to sh.. hole than CANADA, LOST! LOST!
    ENGLAND… UMMMM have to be a Samurai warrior to visit London and some other parts of that already a sh.. hole
    CONCLUSION
    Admirer of failures or as we used to say….Following the stupideeee
    WAKE UP

    • kamtanblog  On December 8, 2019 at 12:25 pm

      Hey wally
      Stop “bad mouthing” Hengland !
      Me 4 picknee and 6 gran picknee
      doing just fine in UK .
      Parenting and grand parenting is what
      matters most today…
      Nah whey u Fran
      Nah whey u bin
      But whey u a huh !

      Attitudes is what matters most…,as positive
      as possible and you can make it anywhere.

      Guyana is changing, will change
      Hopefully from within influenced by us
      in the diaspora !

      It is the Shepard that leads his flock
      People are people no matter where they
      reside…strong leadership a neccessary
      evil.

      Go figure

      Kamtan 🇬🇧🇬🇾🇪🇸🇬🇧👽

    • kamtanblog  On December 8, 2019 at 1:56 pm

      Wally
      “siding with the weak leaders”

      Really !

      Potus is probably the most powerful person
      on the planet ! Inside USA.
      On the world stage he is probably the most
      despised. Can only put it down to his
      ineptitude. Politricks is a dirty game and
      those who we choose to serve us seldom
      do….all have their hidden agendas.
      DT is a loner not a leader.
      He is also a radical…radicals change the
      world. DT is certainly doing that !
      Agree macron and trudeaux are babies
      by comparison.

    • Emanuel  On December 10, 2019 at 6:16 am

      You’d have to be a moron, or someone with vested interest, to support a sick, deranged misfit like the man-child occupant of the Big House on Pennsylvania Avenue. Or someone who is profoundly uninformed and stupid.

  • wally n  On December 8, 2019 at 1:34 pm

    Kamptan. only opinions. but it is coming even on this site people favoring only with what they agree

  • Clyde Duncan  On December 9, 2019 at 5:39 pm

    House Passes Voting Rights Bill to Restore One Struck Down by Supreme Court

    Colby Itkowitz | The Washington Post

    The House passed legislation Friday, 06 Dec 2019, restoring protections of the landmark 1965 Voting Rights Act that were undone when the Supreme Court struck down federal oversight of elections in states with a history of discriminating against minority communities.

    The bill passed 228 to 187, with unanimous Democratic support and the vote of one Republican — Rep. Brian Fitzpatrick (Pa.).

    “No longer will cynical politicians and states with dark histories of discrimination have the green light to freely continue their systemic suppression campaign,” House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) said on the floor.

    THE BILL FACES LONG ODDS OF BECOMING LAW, with opposition in the Republican-controlled Senate and the White House threatening a veto by President Trump.

    Half a century after President Lyndon B. Johnson signed the Voting Rights Act to protect the rights of all Americans to vote, the 2013 Supreme Court decision in Shelby County v. Holder overturned some of those protections, asserting that they were no longer needed.

    The bill would allow federal oversight for state and local jurisdictions that enact stricter voters laws that disproportionately suppress the vote in communities of color.

    In her speech on the House floor, Pelosi said at least 23 states have enacted “voter suppression laws, including voter purges, strict ID requirements, poll closures, voter intimidation, denying millions their voice by their vote” since the Supreme Court ruling.

    “This bill restores the Voting Rights Act’s strength to combat the clear resurgence of voter discrimination unleashed by Shelby by updating the data determining which states and practices are covered by the law,” she said.

    The sponsor of the bill was Rep. Terri A. Sewell (D-Ala.) who represents Selma, where civil rights protesters, including Rep. John Lewis (D-Ga.), were beaten when crossing the Edmund Pettus Bridge in 1965.

    “I dare say that SELMA IS STILL NOW. Since the Shelby decision, 25 states have put in stricter voter restriction laws. SELMA IS STILL NOW because since the Shelby decision, 12 states have laws making it harder for citizens to register and stay registered,” Sewell said on the House floor.

    Lewis presided over the vote and announced the measure’s passage to applause from his Democratic colleagues.

    THE BILL FACES LONG ODDS OF BECOMING LAW, with opposition in the Republican-controlled Senate and the White House threatening a veto by President Trump.

  • Clyde Duncan  On December 10, 2019 at 4:31 pm

  • Clyde Duncan  On December 10, 2019 at 4:35 pm

  • kamtanblog  On December 11, 2019 at 4:10 am

    Clyde
    Interesting but all very speculative !
    Will Potus be given a second term ?
    Most of past presidents have been given
    a second chance …is Humpity Dumpity
    the exception or rule ?

    My crystal ball says USA is stuck with their
    elected jackass for another term.

    We shall see

    Kamtan🇬🇧🇬🇾🇬🇧🇪🇸🇬🇧👽

  • wally  On December 11, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    QUESTION? kamptan, your selection, as a worthy for president.

    • kamtanblog  On December 11, 2019 at 8:42 pm

      Least corrupt/corruptable

      When corruption is endemic in society
      antibiotics not solution…surgery neccessary

      Guyana will need a revolution to reduce remove corruption.
      Strong leadership !

      In my opinion

      Kamtan🇬🇧🇬🇾🇪🇸🇬🇧👽

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